Daddy Found a Butt Munch

All hail the mighty rainbow trout!

The past several posts here featured swans, chickens, lizards and tigers.  This post is an attempt to launch out of the animal world and back into the human, but let’s go out in style, shall we?

As Dave Barry used to say, I am not making this up.

After a couple of hours out of the house this weekend, I returned to the breathless excitement of my young daughter exclaiming, “Momma!  Come see!  Daddy found a butt munch.”

Ahem?  I mean, I’m sure he did.  What?

Rod and reel....where are the fish?She dragged me into the kitchen where her father rolled his eyes in mock horror.  “You’d think fishing is safe….we were just looking at fishing flies.”

My girl proudly opened the latest L.L. Bean fishing catalogue.  “See, momma, there’s the butt munch.”  And lo and behold, there it was.  The Butt Munch Beetle, to be exact.  It comes in metallic blue, metallic copper, or metallic green.  $2.25 each.

Here are some other words and phrases we acquired recently, thanks to L. L.:

  • Psycho Prince
  • Squirrel Nymph
  • Quasimodo
  • New Trick Soft Hackle
  • Mouserat
  • Hornberg
  • Surf Candy
  • Crazy Charlie
  • Rag Head Crab

And while these, my friends, hold a fair amount of barely suppressed laughter from the parents in the house, by far and away the child’s all-time favorites are……..wait for it…………

The Bean Wooly Bugger

The Egg Sucking Crystal Leech and the Hot Bead Bugger.  Wooly Bugger comes in a distant third, and let me tell you, it’s no surprise a Hot Bead Bugger will cost you a pretty penny.  It’s $2.25 where the Wooly Bugger is but $1.85.

Not particularly noted by the child, but worthy of honorable mention to those of you who appreciate such strange pockets of humor, I leave you with my nominees for underdog flies of 2011:  The Shenandoah Chugger; The Humpy; The Conehead Madonna; The Zonker; and The Mushmouth.   Sometimes truth is just funnier than anything you can imagine….and I am not making that up.

Image credits (in order of appearance): Mountain Anglers, J. Gaucher, L.L. Bean

The Imagined Tiger

Sometimes I simply wonder, does everything have to mean something?

The shootings in Arizona scream out for commentary, and there is plenty of it already.  I think David Gergen’s piece, “No Time for Finger Pointing,” does an excellent job of acknowledging some possible contributing factors to the horrible event, but also of asking for a time-out on blame casting and causality theories.

When bad things happen, we need to find cause and fix blame.  It must comfort us in some way to think that hindsight will surely demonstrate some kind of rational explanation that will stop the violence.

I’ve reached a point in my life where I no longer go through this process, because the process has failed me too many times.  There will always be random and unforeseen destructive impulses that lurch forth, striking down members of the human family who never saw it coming.

I liked what a local journalist in West Virginia had to say on Twitter: @RyRivard What is almost no one talking about re: shooting? Mental health services in U.S. Why? Probably not sexy enough/too complicated.

Everything there makes sense to me.  Sarah Palin and people of her rhetorical technique aren’t helping anything, but I hardly think it’s rational to suggest they are responsible for what a deranged individual did.  It would be comforting to think if we were all just nicer and more civil to one another in public discourse, unhinged and unstable young men wouldn’t pick up firearms and take out their rage at the world in bloody displays of false courage.  Unfortunately, it just doesn’t work like that.

How does it work?  Obviously, no one knows.  My small contribution to the conversation is this: Sometimes, as hard as it is to swallow, there is no answer.  This has happened before in human history, and it will keep happening, no matter what we do or don’t do.  None of us are so powerful as to legislate or meditate a 180 degree change in human nature across the board.

Get serious about mental health services and yes, gun control laws especially where mental health is at issue.  Don’t get sucked into phony debates about whether the right or the left is to blame for this sad and terrible event.  Be a little less likely to rant and rave, but be willing to disagree and to talk.  And realize, perhaps, that sometimes there is no deep meaning to or clear cause of tragedy.  Someone’s death may be senseless, but that does not mean his or her life was.  Focusing on life is my biggest comfort right now.

As my friend Rick summed up so well in his post Causes and Reasons, we are wired to keep trying to find the patterns, and perhaps that is not such a terrible thing after all.

Often we’re wrong in attributing agency to things that just happen, but in evolutionary terms the consequences of a false positive are not as bad as that of a false negative. Being mistaken in trying to escape an imagined tiger isn’t as costly as not trying to escape from a real one.

Image credit: CNT Photo Illustrations